I can't say that my choir life had auspicious beginnings. In fact, you might even say the opposite. Honestly, I hated choir back in the day. Let me rephrase that. I despised it. Wait, that didn't come out quite right. I loathed it. Darn, that didn't sound too good either. No matter how I sugarcoat it, the real truth is the same. Choir and I didn't really get along in the early 2000s. Nope, not at all. Every week, I'd complain and drag and complain some more about how choir was such a useless waste of time and how it was soooo boring and how I thought it was so pointless and I'd never get anything out of it ever and it was draining our income and how I should quit. Immediately. Some of my worst memories back in the day were from choir. Boring, boring, boring, getting in trouble talking in class, boring, boring, accidentally eating a dog snack, boring, boring. At this point you could say choir and I had been having a turbulent love affair. Heck, you could barely call it a love affair.
Slowly as I grew older, thing started looking up. I don't even remember Rainbow, Red, or Orange. In Yellow we took a trip to San Diego, that was pretty fun. I have some memories from that trip, staying up eating junk food and playing pranks. Those were good times. I started thinking, 'Hey, maybe choir's not that bad.' The next year, we took a trip to New York. That was pretty good too. Could it get better from here?
The answer? Absolutely! I got into Concert level and I think it was around then that I started making friends. Yeah, that's right, friends! Amigos! Peng You! Buddies! Pals! There was the Italy trip, and that was pretty fun. I got my first taste of singing with the Young Men, and that was great. One more time, could it get better from here?
The answer? Yes Sir! I reached the Youth/Young Men's group and times were good. No more struggling every rehearsal with airy falsetto, fighting to be heard. I wouldn't say I hit the ground running though. It took me a long time to get my feet wet. I wasn't the most confident child ever, so it took me a while to get to know people. Plus, we had a conductor named Roger. He was kind of boring. Reminiscent of the times in lower levels. Still, it was pretty good. I met some new people and grew closer to the friends I already had. Choir began to take a more prominent place in my life, right up there behind school and then swimming at the time.
Then, this year came. Roger out, extra Young Men time in. The music we sang this year was exciting and fun. With every passing rehearsal my confidence grew, I learned a bit more. Once in a while, maybe I talked to someone I never talked to before, and maybe made a new friend. I'm never going to say I made rapid progress. That's not how it was. But slowly and surely I grew to really love choir. It's kind of like a flower. Flowers don't grow over night. They take a while to develop. Plus they take alot of sunshine, water, and fertilizer to grow. But when they finally grow out to their full potential, they're beautiful to behold. That's me in choir. I took, and am still taking, alot of time to develop. Plus, I need alot of sunshine and water to develop. I'll pass on the fertilizer though. And I don't quite know how I'll turn out yet. It could be good, maybe bad, perhaps average. Anyways, what really capped off the choir year for me was the annual concerts and the Canada trip. At the annual concerts, it hit me that the end was already here. 'Woah, that was fast. That was a fun year. I really learned alot. I'm looking forward to next year.'
Canada was the experience that really opened my eyes. I've written my thoughts on it already, but to sum it up, it was incredible meeting all of these people and to share our music together. Yet another amazing experience was to see people moved by our music. That's something that somebody outside of the musical world will never understand, the power of music.
I consider school and choir the two most important things in my life. I also consider them two completely different worlds. At times, school people can be cold, criticizing, harsh, unaccepting, and generally unwelcoming. I can honestly say that I have never found choir like that. Choir people are always supportive, kind, caring, and welcoming. If I had to describe the way I see it, I'd say that I consider most of the people I know at school friends, associates, and good friends. I'd call choir people family. That's what we are. We back each other up and are always there for each other. We cherish the happy times together and support each other in the bad times. How many school friends can you say that about? Probably a handful.
The graduating seniors and alumni always tell me how lucky I am to be so young and have so many years left in choir, and how I should cherish it well. In earlier years, I was naive, and would think nothing of their words of wisdom. I'm just now fully realizing what it means to be a chorister and appreciating the opportunities that I'm receiving as well as the experiences I go through as part of the choir. I consider myself beyond lucky that my parents forced me to stick with it through all of the years. I'm eagerly anticipating my last 3 years in choir; I have no doubts whatsoever that they will be amazing.
To everyone who is a part of choir, thank you for being a part of the best part of my life.
Much Love
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Monday, July 6, 2009
Canada '09
Time of your life
'Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road. Time grabs you by the wrist,
directs you where to go.
So make the best of the test, and don't ask why. It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time.
It's something unpredictable, but in the end
it's right.
I hope you had the time of you life.
So take the photographs and still
frames in your mind.
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time.
Tattoos and
memories and dead skin on trial.
For what it's worth, it was worth all the while.
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of
your life.'
Canada '09, to put it frankly, was among the most, if not the very most amazing experience I have ever had in my entire life. It was fun, memorable, moving, sentimental, enjoyable and everything in between. It was a really intense bonding experience. Not only did I forge new friendships with my fellow choristers in Crystal Choir and exponentially strengthen my bonds with my existing friends, but I met great amounts of new people from places such as Chicago, Illinois, Quebec, Montreal, and other places. At first I was honestly really daunted by the prospect of trying to meet new people. What shocked me was not only how easy it was to talk to these people that I'd never met before in my entire life, but how welcome they made me feel and it made me think 'Why aren't people in other places like this? Why aren't all the people at school like this?' At school sometimes people are cold, sometimes they're judge mental, sometimes they're flat out mean. None of that here. At the festival I didn't meet a single person who was like that. It wasn't about sexes. The number of unfamiliar girls there far outnumbered the amount of unfamiliar guys there, but that had nothing to do with it. If anything, we bonded tighter with our fellow guys than with girls there, and in no time at all. We became bros overnight. We became one unit, a really cohesive bunch. One of our guest conductors, Dr. Adam Con noted that, saying 'Now you guys just all sound like one voice."
That brings us to the two conductors. Both of them were unique in their style, but both were fun to work with, insightful, and wise. It was very unfortunate that we only had so much time to soak up their teachings. Dr. Adam Con, dubbed A-Con, was the funny energetic tai chi master. The most significant lesson that I will carry on from him is the concept of 'being here.' What he had us do was put our fingers on the top of our fists, telling us to 'be here, and nowhere else. Just be here for a while.' This was particularly significant to me because for some reason or another, I have problems focusing and concentrating on one thing sometimes, so to have this simple exercise I can do to retain my focus for me was huge. He also gave us all a great feeling of responsibility, saying 'If you guys mess up because of me, it's my fault. But if you mess up because of you, it's your fault.' Personally I liked how he treated us like adults. The other conductor, Francisco Nunez, was a passionate guy who looked like Raymond from Everybody loves Raymond. At first it was really frustrating to rehearse with him because he was so meticulous. We'd have to do everything phrase in the music over and over again; it seemed like no matter what we did, he could always find a flaw. But as we got more familiar with the music and more accustomed to his style of conducting, it was a blast to sing with him. He had an intense inner fire to him that was flat out contagious. He often spoke to us about passion, ranting about it off and on during his rehearsals. He'd say "Come on! I don't feel your passion! Where is your passion? Without passion, you're all just a bunch of kids singing some notes. You're not musicians." I've really taken that to heart. Passion is really important. There a level in everything you do that you simply cannot reach if you have no passion. Passion drives you, motivates you, keeps you ticking. That's why Francisco is so great at what he does. He's got such great passion about what he does and he cares so much, he can't help but be good.
Sure, the trip was great for it's educational value and social value, but a great deal of what made the trip so memorable was the sentimental value, the emotions. At our featured performance, it was really nice to see all of our hard work come to fruition in the form of standing ovations and screaming crowds. It was all such a huge jolt of adrenaline. It made us all feel like rock stars.But that's just the cherry on top. The important thing about it is that we all had fun with it, left it all on stage with no regrets. Sure, you'll remember the screaming crowds, but as all of your memories mush together like bad mashed potatoes, you'll still clearly carry the memories of laying it all on stage with your best buddies. At the closing ceremony when all of us were all on stage together, it was complete unity. It was as if every song we sang was 'We are family,' except not. I don't really know how to explain it. It was incredible. After we finished performing our program, George played 'Praise his holy name' as we filed out of the auditorium. That was really cool, and a great way to end a great series of performances at the festival. It was kind of like a 'sing me down the road' thing, like in the movies about pioneers on the plains. Maybe that last bit doesn't make sense. That's just how I feel.
I've saved the best one for last. It deserved a whole paragraph to itself. This last performance wasn't even really part of the festival. For all you non-goer-on-trippers, you probably think that this was a massive concert in front of millions and millions of screaming fans and that is why it is so deserving of it's own body of words. That is entirely incorrect. Our concert in Seattle on our way back home from Vancouver took place in a small, hot, church in front of an audience of maybe 200 old asian people. At the beginning of the day, most of us were complaining about having to perform in our current state, battered, tired, and sick. At the end of the day, I wouldn't have had it any other way. Come show time, all complaints--except about the weather--had vanished. Despite our worn out state, our performance was just as good, if not better than the ones we'd already given. One memory from performing which I will never forget is just a random observation. While performing 'Child of God,' I noticed an old man in the middle of the crowd watching us. Just a random old man. As the song went on and our choreography got more and more energetic, his mouth dropped wide upon. At the end of the song, he cheered loudly and clapped energetically, as if he were 5 years old. That absolutely made my day. After all, to perform is to try to connect with the audience and make them happy. That wasn't even the most memorable part. There was more to come. Our last song, Zai Bie Kang Qiao 'Farewell to Cambridge,' was a song that another choir had already sung earlier. To perform it again was a daring move. It could either be a big flop or a hit. When our harmonized 'mmms' trailed off, the crowd of people stood up and clapped and cheered and clapped and cheered. Mind you, this was a crowd of lethargic old people, not the enthusiastic teenage girls we were used to. To move a crowd of elderly people with our music enough for them to stand up and cheer like they would in their golden days really touched me and showed me the real power of music.That something that people who don't do music will never understand. It's just not a feeling you can explain. What's more, during the song, our conductor Karl, started crying, and then so did his son, Kevin, which started a mini chain of crying, tears of sadness from the seniors who were singing their last song ever with choir, and from everyone else who was sad because of the departing seniors. It wasn't over. After a brief reception with really strange tasting tea, we were at it again. Karl corralled us all to the stage to sing three more songs. 'We are the Choir,' 'Time to say goodbye,' and 'You Raise me up.' I hadn't cried during the first 'finale.' I wasn't really expecting to, or planning on crying the second time. But as we started singing, I really couldn't help myself.
Lyrics as followed:
We are the Choir
'Another year has come and gone. A year of joy and tears, love and work and song.
What can we say? What can we do? How can we let you know how we feel today?
We are the choir, and we will sing for you. It seems like yesterday we first shared a song.
Only yesterday we sang it loud and strong. And when tomorrow comes, though we're far
apart, all our memories, we'll carry in our hearts.
So here we stand, hand in hand. Our voices soaring high, like a bird in flight.
We are the choir, and we have sung tonight.'
I probably cracked and broke down around...What can we say? Nope, I didn't last long at all. All around everyone started crying. It was moving, sentimental,touching and stunning with a little amazing mixed in to see all of these people crying. Typing those lyrics just now still gave me a jolt of emotion. You know that feeling? That feeling where it goes either up from your feet and then quickly through your body up to your head like you suddenly get warm? Or the other way, from your head down to your feet? Happened while I was typing that. Makes the bottom of my heart heat up. I guess I've discovered the real meaning of 'from the bottom of my heart.'
Time to say goodbye [English]
'When I feel so all alone I dream of the horizon and words fail me. Yes, I know
there is no shedding sunlight in a room where sun is missing.
If you're not here, you're not here with me. From every window, I will shout that I give you heart, my whole heart.
You gave me, you gave me hope. You gave me light that you found by the way side.
Time to say goodbye, to places I've never seen. To places I've not shared with you.
Forever I will go on. I'll sail, sail with you. On ships I will sail, across the seas.
The seas that no longer exist. It's time to say goodbye.
When you are so far away, I dream of the horizon and words fail me. And of course, I know that you are with me.
You, my moon, are with me. You, my sun, are with me, you'll always be with me.
Time to say goodbye, to places I've never seen. To places I've not shared with you.
Forever I will go on. I'll sail, sail with you. On ships I will sail, across the seas.
The seas that no longer exist. It's time to say goodbye. Sail with you. You and I!'
The song is sung in Italian, and the song doesn't really make sense in English, but basically the moot point is saying goodbye. I honestly didn't sing 90% of the sing, my throat was too choked up for any sounds--let alone words-- come out.
You raise me up
'http://www.lyricsdomain.com/10/josh_groban/you_raise_me_up.html'
My fingers are getting tired. This was our final song all together, I believe. At the end of the song, it was just a massive hug fest, tears all around, it was very emotional. I feel as though the words moving, touching, sentimental, memorable,and emotional have been used about a trillion times in this post, but it is absolutely necessary. I saw a quote in a friend's AIM profile that I really liked. It said: 'Real men don't cry for themselves, but for their comrades,' referring to our emotion-filled last day.
Amen Brutha.
There are other memories.. eating 50 orders of sashimi in a huge team effort, and many others which I can't think of right now that really added to the trip experience. But what really made my trip was the show of pure, raw, unfettered human emotion, the show of unjudgemental unconditional friendliness displayed by people we'd never met before in our lives, being able to come together with other choirs and share the gift of music, moving people with our music, learning from the teachings of two brilliant conductors, and being able to bond so much with those within our choir. I guess what I'm trying to say is that something like this doesn't come along very often. It's not like it happens to you every day. I really appreciate that I got the chance to go on this trip and experience all of this. For that I consider myself lucky.
Much love to all and best of wishes to the seniors of '09.
'It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of your life.'
'Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road. Time grabs you by the wrist,
directs you where to go.
So make the best of the test, and don't ask why. It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time.
It's something unpredictable, but in the end
it's right.
I hope you had the time of you life.
So take the photographs and still
frames in your mind.
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time.
Tattoos and
memories and dead skin on trial.
For what it's worth, it was worth all the while.
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of
your life.'
Canada '09, to put it frankly, was among the most, if not the very most amazing experience I have ever had in my entire life. It was fun, memorable, moving, sentimental, enjoyable and everything in between. It was a really intense bonding experience. Not only did I forge new friendships with my fellow choristers in Crystal Choir and exponentially strengthen my bonds with my existing friends, but I met great amounts of new people from places such as Chicago, Illinois, Quebec, Montreal, and other places. At first I was honestly really daunted by the prospect of trying to meet new people. What shocked me was not only how easy it was to talk to these people that I'd never met before in my entire life, but how welcome they made me feel and it made me think 'Why aren't people in other places like this? Why aren't all the people at school like this?' At school sometimes people are cold, sometimes they're judge mental, sometimes they're flat out mean. None of that here. At the festival I didn't meet a single person who was like that. It wasn't about sexes. The number of unfamiliar girls there far outnumbered the amount of unfamiliar guys there, but that had nothing to do with it. If anything, we bonded tighter with our fellow guys than with girls there, and in no time at all. We became bros overnight. We became one unit, a really cohesive bunch. One of our guest conductors, Dr. Adam Con noted that, saying 'Now you guys just all sound like one voice."
That brings us to the two conductors. Both of them were unique in their style, but both were fun to work with, insightful, and wise. It was very unfortunate that we only had so much time to soak up their teachings. Dr. Adam Con, dubbed A-Con, was the funny energetic tai chi master. The most significant lesson that I will carry on from him is the concept of 'being here.' What he had us do was put our fingers on the top of our fists, telling us to 'be here, and nowhere else. Just be here for a while.' This was particularly significant to me because for some reason or another, I have problems focusing and concentrating on one thing sometimes, so to have this simple exercise I can do to retain my focus for me was huge. He also gave us all a great feeling of responsibility, saying 'If you guys mess up because of me, it's my fault. But if you mess up because of you, it's your fault.' Personally I liked how he treated us like adults. The other conductor, Francisco Nunez, was a passionate guy who looked like Raymond from Everybody loves Raymond. At first it was really frustrating to rehearse with him because he was so meticulous. We'd have to do everything phrase in the music over and over again; it seemed like no matter what we did, he could always find a flaw. But as we got more familiar with the music and more accustomed to his style of conducting, it was a blast to sing with him. He had an intense inner fire to him that was flat out contagious. He often spoke to us about passion, ranting about it off and on during his rehearsals. He'd say "Come on! I don't feel your passion! Where is your passion? Without passion, you're all just a bunch of kids singing some notes. You're not musicians." I've really taken that to heart. Passion is really important. There a level in everything you do that you simply cannot reach if you have no passion. Passion drives you, motivates you, keeps you ticking. That's why Francisco is so great at what he does. He's got such great passion about what he does and he cares so much, he can't help but be good.
Sure, the trip was great for it's educational value and social value, but a great deal of what made the trip so memorable was the sentimental value, the emotions. At our featured performance, it was really nice to see all of our hard work come to fruition in the form of standing ovations and screaming crowds. It was all such a huge jolt of adrenaline. It made us all feel like rock stars.But that's just the cherry on top. The important thing about it is that we all had fun with it, left it all on stage with no regrets. Sure, you'll remember the screaming crowds, but as all of your memories mush together like bad mashed potatoes, you'll still clearly carry the memories of laying it all on stage with your best buddies. At the closing ceremony when all of us were all on stage together, it was complete unity. It was as if every song we sang was 'We are family,' except not. I don't really know how to explain it. It was incredible. After we finished performing our program, George played 'Praise his holy name' as we filed out of the auditorium. That was really cool, and a great way to end a great series of performances at the festival. It was kind of like a 'sing me down the road' thing, like in the movies about pioneers on the plains. Maybe that last bit doesn't make sense. That's just how I feel.
I've saved the best one for last. It deserved a whole paragraph to itself. This last performance wasn't even really part of the festival. For all you non-goer-on-trippers, you probably think that this was a massive concert in front of millions and millions of screaming fans and that is why it is so deserving of it's own body of words. That is entirely incorrect. Our concert in Seattle on our way back home from Vancouver took place in a small, hot, church in front of an audience of maybe 200 old asian people. At the beginning of the day, most of us were complaining about having to perform in our current state, battered, tired, and sick. At the end of the day, I wouldn't have had it any other way. Come show time, all complaints--except about the weather--had vanished. Despite our worn out state, our performance was just as good, if not better than the ones we'd already given. One memory from performing which I will never forget is just a random observation. While performing 'Child of God,' I noticed an old man in the middle of the crowd watching us. Just a random old man. As the song went on and our choreography got more and more energetic, his mouth dropped wide upon. At the end of the song, he cheered loudly and clapped energetically, as if he were 5 years old. That absolutely made my day. After all, to perform is to try to connect with the audience and make them happy. That wasn't even the most memorable part. There was more to come. Our last song, Zai Bie Kang Qiao 'Farewell to Cambridge,' was a song that another choir had already sung earlier. To perform it again was a daring move. It could either be a big flop or a hit. When our harmonized 'mmms' trailed off, the crowd of people stood up and clapped and cheered and clapped and cheered. Mind you, this was a crowd of lethargic old people, not the enthusiastic teenage girls we were used to. To move a crowd of elderly people with our music enough for them to stand up and cheer like they would in their golden days really touched me and showed me the real power of music.That something that people who don't do music will never understand. It's just not a feeling you can explain. What's more, during the song, our conductor Karl, started crying, and then so did his son, Kevin, which started a mini chain of crying, tears of sadness from the seniors who were singing their last song ever with choir, and from everyone else who was sad because of the departing seniors. It wasn't over. After a brief reception with really strange tasting tea, we were at it again. Karl corralled us all to the stage to sing three more songs. 'We are the Choir,' 'Time to say goodbye,' and 'You Raise me up.' I hadn't cried during the first 'finale.' I wasn't really expecting to, or planning on crying the second time. But as we started singing, I really couldn't help myself.
Lyrics as followed:
We are the Choir
'Another year has come and gone. A year of joy and tears, love and work and song.
What can we say? What can we do? How can we let you know how we feel today?
We are the choir, and we will sing for you. It seems like yesterday we first shared a song.
Only yesterday we sang it loud and strong. And when tomorrow comes, though we're far
apart, all our memories, we'll carry in our hearts.
So here we stand, hand in hand. Our voices soaring high, like a bird in flight.
We are the choir, and we have sung tonight.'
I probably cracked and broke down around...What can we say? Nope, I didn't last long at all. All around everyone started crying. It was moving, sentimental,touching and stunning with a little amazing mixed in to see all of these people crying. Typing those lyrics just now still gave me a jolt of emotion. You know that feeling? That feeling where it goes either up from your feet and then quickly through your body up to your head like you suddenly get warm? Or the other way, from your head down to your feet? Happened while I was typing that. Makes the bottom of my heart heat up. I guess I've discovered the real meaning of 'from the bottom of my heart.'
Time to say goodbye [English]
'When I feel so all alone I dream of the horizon and words fail me. Yes, I know
there is no shedding sunlight in a room where sun is missing.
If you're not here, you're not here with me. From every window, I will shout that I give you heart, my whole heart.
You gave me, you gave me hope. You gave me light that you found by the way side.
Time to say goodbye, to places I've never seen. To places I've not shared with you.
Forever I will go on. I'll sail, sail with you. On ships I will sail, across the seas.
The seas that no longer exist. It's time to say goodbye.
When you are so far away, I dream of the horizon and words fail me. And of course, I know that you are with me.
You, my moon, are with me. You, my sun, are with me, you'll always be with me.
Time to say goodbye, to places I've never seen. To places I've not shared with you.
Forever I will go on. I'll sail, sail with you. On ships I will sail, across the seas.
The seas that no longer exist. It's time to say goodbye. Sail with you. You and I!'
The song is sung in Italian, and the song doesn't really make sense in English, but basically the moot point is saying goodbye. I honestly didn't sing 90% of the sing, my throat was too choked up for any sounds--let alone words-- come out.
You raise me up
'http://www.lyricsdomain.com/10/josh_groban/you_raise_me_up.html'
My fingers are getting tired. This was our final song all together, I believe. At the end of the song, it was just a massive hug fest, tears all around, it was very emotional. I feel as though the words moving, touching, sentimental, memorable,and emotional have been used about a trillion times in this post, but it is absolutely necessary. I saw a quote in a friend's AIM profile that I really liked. It said: 'Real men don't cry for themselves, but for their comrades,' referring to our emotion-filled last day.
Amen Brutha.
There are other memories.. eating 50 orders of sashimi in a huge team effort, and many others which I can't think of right now that really added to the trip experience. But what really made my trip was the show of pure, raw, unfettered human emotion, the show of unjudgemental unconditional friendliness displayed by people we'd never met before in our lives, being able to come together with other choirs and share the gift of music, moving people with our music, learning from the teachings of two brilliant conductors, and being able to bond so much with those within our choir. I guess what I'm trying to say is that something like this doesn't come along very often. It's not like it happens to you every day. I really appreciate that I got the chance to go on this trip and experience all of this. For that I consider myself lucky.
Much love to all and best of wishes to the seniors of '09.
'It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of your life.'
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